"Jesus answered, 'If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow Me.'" John 21:22
For several weeks it seemed as if I was constantly fighting the nagging thought of "It's not fair...everyone else is 'making it' but me. It seemed it did not matter how much I prayed or how much I read the Scriptures. Finally, one night I was praying, and even though I fought hard not to let the tantrum my brain was having, those thoughts came right out of my mouth. I can't tell you how long I was in full tantrum mode but I can tell you I jolted out of it with laughter at God's reply. How I wish I could write that He showed me a deeply hidden secret in the scriptures worthy of biblical investigation skills, but alas I cannot. God's reply was simply "That's enough Opie." I knew instantly what He meant as the "Opie and the Spoiled Kid" episode of The Andy Griffith Show began to play in my mind.
Later after the laughter subsided and I was able to be reasoned with, I was reminded of another favorite scripture of mine - John 21:22. This passage described the conversation between Jesus and Peter. God had just commissioned Peter in the famous "Peter, do you love Me" passage of Scripture. Jesus was calling Peter to feed His sheep, and He informed Peter of the death he would encounter for following Him. But Peter had a question. He wondered what was going to happen to John. Would John have the same trials, the same responsibility, as Peter? Jesus quickly retorted to Peter, "What is that to you?"
Yep, it was confirmed, no matter how much I tried to hold it in - I was guilty of envy. I had several friends who were now "making it" not only in business but ministry as well. I began to compare where I was in life. It brought me into a state of "it's not fair". Once I realized this, (and that God was not going to budge from what He told me I was to do) I asked the Lord to forgive me. I did not ask for forgiveness just for my stinky attitude but also for doubting for one minute that the Lord wanted anything for me but the best.
The Lord wants us to know that He has an original plan set up for His children and we can't fulfill that plan if we worry about someone else. God has called us to a unique life that may look totally different from anyone else's life. Once we begin to compare ourselves to others, we begin to live for others and ourselves.
So, does the Lord want you successful? I would scream at you YES! So now we have to ask what does that success look like?